You’ve got to love new experiences because they lead to new insights. For example, I have a whole new perception of things like “letting your hair down,” and what can define a”toxic relationship,” and the opposite of that, and “fighting like a girl,” Let’s see if we can get them all in.
On letting your hair down –
When taking off a head scarf becomes an adventure in “take it off, take it ALL off.” When wispy, stray hairs drip through your fingers and shower to the floor. I let my hair down and some of it goes all the way to the ground. And you know it’s coming, but it is nonetheless alarming, and you are instructed to let things progress naturally because your scalp is going to be sensitive so hold off forced removal, but hey, if you’re ready, you’re ready. I’m just saying.
My fine cranium. Swear to Pete, it’s pretty darn cute. I went to my hair dresser today. I told her she’d be the first to witness my cranial reveal. That cracked her up. It was so very much better spiritually and emotionally to take charge of the situation. Honestly, the handful after handful of hair for two days running was quite enough of that. Here is a beautiful quote from an old friend who just caught up with me on Thanksgiving Day, and who wrote this in an e-mail, “Something I’ve learned . . . It’s how miraculously fragile we all are and how tenuous our connection is to this reality. It’s important to celebrate the small moments and share our collective energies and positivism, to reach out, love and be loved. Joy is the palliative for all hurts, and is far too easily overlooked and forgotten, given in to bitterness and anger.”
So my hair dresser buzzed away the depressing, expiring locks, and when she finished I lifted my head and shook it, and her eyes got moist and she said, “You are absolutely stunning . . . beautiful. You could pull that off without anything to cover it.” And I said, “If it wasn’t so cold, it’s winter! ” And we laughed, and I was filled with joy. Opposite of Toxic.
My friend of the e-mail had followed up with, “Hair is a passing fad, take pictures.” You know you’ll want them later. And finally, he quoted someone else, “Norman Cousins was correct in his analysis: cancer, in all it’s many detestable manifestations in our species, despises laughter.”
So if cancer despises laughter, I’m so gonna make it hate me.
On toxic relationships –
Did you know that intimate relations are to be avoided for 72 hours after infusions? You could burn your partner. New definition of toxic relations, no? But it is only a few days, I drink lots of water after infusions to be safe. So I asked my husband if he’d still be intimate with me when I’m bald, and his response? “YOU are still intimate with me, and I”M bald.” He’s a beautiful man. Another opposite of toxic.
I fight like a girl. I fight with wigs, and scarves, and creams and hair dressers, and tears, and laughter, and pride, and girlfriends. How do you fight?